Weak Growth
Very often when people think or talk about growth in the Christian life we tend to see it as congruent or parallel to all other kinds of growth in the world. We think it is a typical upward trajectory…a steady ascent…a 45 degree angle on a basic graph. There may be some little dips here and there if you were to zoom in on a particular day, but the big picture is always upward. That’s even how it sounds when Paul talks about it here in Ephesians 4. We’re moving on from being little children to mature adults (v. 13-14). But that is not how Christian growth actually works.
We certainly do grow as Christians…Paul is not misleading us, but the way of Christian growth is not congruent with the world’s understanding of growth. In fact, it flies in the face of it. The world thinks of growth as moving from a state of dependence to independence. Just think of Paul’s imagery of moving from a child to an adult…with our worldly glasses on we would read that as becoming more independent…more autonomous you might even say. Less needy, less weak, stronger. As Kanye West rapped in 2007, “Now that that don’t kill me can only make me stronger. I need you to hurry up now ‘cause I can’t wait much longer. Bigger, better, faster, stronger.” Ironically, that was the beginning of Kanye’s slide into megalomania insanity. He got so strong for a little while there he thought he was actually Jesus! But, thankfully, he has since returned to earth and has had what seems to be a genuine return to faith. But that is another topic for another time.
Growth in the Christian life is decidedly different. It is not a moving on from our problems or growing into more and more independence where you are less and less needy. Christian growth is always becoming more and more aware of your need for Jesus. It is moving deeper and deeper into dependence experientially. Moving deeper and deeper into Jesus. You become more aware of your sin and shortcomings not less. Robert Farrar Capon said it perfectly: “The opposite of sin is not virtue it is faith” (Between Noon and Three: Romance, Law & the Outrage of Grace).
Naturally, we don’t like this very much. Did you watch Simone Biles pull out of the women’s gymnastics team competition last night? My first reaction was terribly harsh…fueled by years of competing in sport all the way through college…I thought, Suck it up! That’s part of competing, fighting through the nerves and adversity. A sad glimpse into my harsh inner world. We’ll come back to that. She was trying to take care of herself, prevent injury, and not drag her team down. The greatest female gymnast of all time pulling out of competition contrasted sharply with every commercial break riddled with ads (many starring Simone herself!) celebrating the very thinking I suffered from…Rise above the adversity! Pursue greatness! Defy the odds! Win! Win! Win! We don’t like weakness.
How about another peek into the glass house that is my mental world:). I started physical therapy for my arm last week, and it was a humbling experience. In just a month of very limited use my right arm has atrophied considerably. The grip in my right and dominant hand is half of what my left hand is. I think my right arm is the weakest it has been since junior high. I could barely open a pickle jar! Even though I claim to have my identity in Jesus and to not be into male stereotypes, etc…I am used to being a pretty strong guy, and my fragile little arm is giving me a full on identity crises. Lord, have mercy!
We reflexively apply this same thinking to faith. We want Christian growth to work just like the world thinks all growth should work. In fact, in the church we have a tendency to use the idea of growth as a distraction from actually dealing with our weakness. Bigger, better, faster, stronger! We focus on virtue all the time even if we don’t use that language very much any more, and it becomes a big distraction from where we’re really living, where our real struggle or pain is. If Kanye is not your thing, there’s always Chuck Berry in 1958, “Go Johnny, go, go, go…Johnny be good!” Just work hard to be good. BUT, the truth is that the only growth that matters at all in your life, that is actually true growth, is the result of going into your real pain...seeing it for what it is and not trying to ignore it or cover it up by trying harder.
Real Christian growth happens when we get honest about our real issues and that only happens when we have heard the gospel...the good news of God’s forgiveness and love for broken and hurting people…for you…for me. This is why Paul says God has given us the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the shepherds and teachers and so on (v. 11). They do one thing…they tell us the good news of God’s grace in Jesus Christ. They always and everywhere point us back to him. As Paul says in our passage we “grow up into Christ”…we grow in our faith in Him (v. 15). His grace and forgiveness is the only message that creates a safe context to really get honest, to call a thing what it is and stop running away from our problems…to stop stuffing them down in the basement and locking the door hoping they never resurface. But they always do and not when or where want them to…as Simone experienced last night.
The world tells you that you should be growing and growth does not look like weakness, it looks like strength, it looks like virtue…like a guy with strong arms or a gold medalist. But the Christian message, the good news of Jesus Christ for sinners, says that getting honest about our weakness is exactly how growth happens. Thank you God for Simone Biles! You only grow in Christian maturity by finally admitting how weak you really are. Paul knew this very well. Our strength is not our testimony. His grace is. His power is made perfect in our weakness. “When I am weak, then I am strong” (2 Cor. 12:9-10). Amen.
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